Resilience and Perspective Revisited

For well over a year I have been working on a book that chronicles my resilient journey through adversity. I am more than 75% done with the first draft. I'm working hard to find the proper time to meet my goal of having the first draft done and to my publisher by the end of … Continue reading Resilience and Perspective Revisited

Nick Cave’s new album is a jaw-dropping listen for those of us who have a close relationship with grief

It’s no secret that music means a lot to me. It’s therapeutic in a way that I can’t even begin to accurately describe. Sometimes it enables me to remember. Other times it allows me to forget. The deep, dark, introspective stuff has a way of speaking directly to me. Nick Cave has been a favorite … Continue reading Nick Cave’s new album is a jaw-dropping listen for those of us who have a close relationship with grief

Celebrating My Past

Grief is a lifelong journey. As much as others wished I could, I could not wave a wand and be over it. My life was turned upside down by the sudden death of my fiancée, Dana. The night prior to heading back to Cal Poly San Luis Obispo for her final weeks before graduation, she … Continue reading Celebrating My Past

A Chance To Talk

A couple of months ago I received an Instagram message from a page called “Snapshots of Life After Loss”. It simply said, “Hi, I just read your story on your blog. Wow. Thank you for sharing your story”. From there we began a correspondence. Gracelyn explained that she ran a company called “The Luna Peak … Continue reading A Chance To Talk

This Time of Year

It always starts in October. I can smell and taste it in the air. The dread, anxiety and anticipation of early November starts to loom. The older I get I am always amazed how quickly it seems to come around. It's been 28 years now. Twenty-eight years since my life was turned upside down by … Continue reading This Time of Year

The Truth About Time

I have been asked to be a recurring contributing writer for Love What Matters, a widely followed site that shares inspiring stories daily. Their editor asked me to write an updated combination of my blog pieces My Story and The Reality of Time. It was published yesterday to a big response. I thought I would share it here too, as it has really … Continue reading The Truth About Time

The Upstairs Room

In a few weeks it will be 25 years since I moved away from Bakersfield, California to Western Kentucky. One of the most difficult things was saying goodbye to Dana’s parents (Dan and Mary). I had become very close with them in the 2 and a half years since Dana had died. But I knew … Continue reading The Upstairs Room

Fear is a by-product of Grief

Over twenty-seven years ago my world was shattered in an instant by a careless driver. I have chronicled here in this blog how I have put the pieces of my life back together over the past quarter century. As I have put my life back together, my amazing immediate family consists of my wife, Shelly, … Continue reading Fear is a by-product of Grief

The 10,000th Day

I have been numbers driven as far back as I can remember, whether in my business or personal life. In my journey since Dana’s death, there have always been many different dates and numbers playing out in my head. Sometimes comforting, other times maddening! An early example of this is that I was aware when … Continue reading The 10,000th Day

Let the Widowed Move Forward Without Judgment

As I have continued moving forward on my long and twisting path since losing Dana, I have finally let much of the negativity go. The most damaging, long-lasting side-effect from the trauma came from the cruelty of judgment.  As I described in "My Story", much of my remaining anger, rage and resentment departed as we were … Continue reading Let the Widowed Move Forward Without Judgment